ENGLAND creaks into the 110th thread - Team ENGLAND just keeps growing.....

Refreshed by a night’s drug-induced sleep, Catherine creeps into the new thread for a quiet and lonely Breakfast Club, but has time to attempt to catch up on the THREE threads she missed whilst away for one night! Elb joins her for coffee as she toils through posts, and announces she is back on Squishing Duty, so unless ENGLAND get the verbal Trots, there SHOULD be an edition of Abridged put out on Monday morning.... Psychic Gusti makes a welcome appearance after her visit to her family home - also trying to catch up on threads, and answers Elb’s questions before she’s asked them! Elb doesn’t know whether she’s coming or going, has to teach Mini-Marek better manners and plans a mini-shopping excursion..... Vanessa joins the Breakfast Crew, and Gusti finally catches up. They and Elb discuss plans for the day, startling Catherine who gets back to discover another three pages have sprung up in her absence......Gusti once again thanks ENGLAND for their support before embarking on a calming day to contemplate her future...

Meanwhile, Elb indulges Mini-Marek’s shopping whims, and passes felicitations on to Jo’s daughter who is 16 today, while Catherine, after the temptations presented by Elb’s dollyspam, considers purchasing her own small portion of Marekness..... Tina drops by in melancholy mood due to overwork, but is slightly cheered by the thought of Marek-sized handcuffs. Els too is feeling fragile after a row with her inconsiderate sibling, and Miss Hyde comes over all funny when she overheats in the shower.....with not even a Gerry in sight to account for it! Marek spends Elb’s hard-earned cash on cute boots and Stranger jacket, planning on being the funkiest dude on the desk, while Elb frets over the health and well-being of the cyber-kids on ENGLAND’s block....... Els recovers with the aid of Coke and jaffa cakes, but complains about being well-read and may remove the ironmongery from her chest to stop further occurrences. Elb would have her frontage reduced if she could, and Jo rushes in to take time out from party preparations to fly by the thread and advise Elb on methods to make Mini-Marek’s towel posing more authentic, and where to buy handcuffs, before dashing off to be the party animal again. Els worries whether to tell her parents that bro has gone AWOL, but they ask anyway, so the problem is shared, and the wanderer returns... Eeyore dresses for winter, and Els posts Tennanty-goodness but loses her happy place....

Sparkle pops in after getting crafty, Eeyore discovers Vanessa is the opposition in footie, while Vanessa giggles in her sleep due to Tart Power invading her shop.... Miss Hyde loses track of time as she has trouble with earthquakes but doesn’t want to turn Nature off, and stressed Goffy celebrates a win for the reds...... ENGLAND get excited about PS2, but it’s all Greek to Elb who indulges in online retail therapy on Marek’s behalf.... Jo escapes from the birthday bedlam, and Vanessa watches ‘Mr & Mrs Smith’, which is like Mr & Mrs Vanessa, only without the guns... Hug-hogging Marsha for once, IS the Quiet Admirer and like Els, isn’t feeling talkative........

ENGLAND hugs....

Vanessa departs to offer comfort for a Real friend in need, and cake-baking Breila is also having a subdued Sunday, while Elb tries and fails to get enthusiastic about football or Playstation. She cheerfully pleads insanity as the reason she has spent all afternoon online seeking out new clothes for Marek, and leaves the door on the latch for the men in white coats... Poor Els is baffled by family, and Breila sympathises as she too has a mother with qualifications in Bafflement, while Miss H thanks goodness that she is the only hormonal teenager chez Hyde....... Gusti thanks her lucky bank balance for making her too skint to buy a Marek, while Eeyore and Jo sympathise with the Pointless Folding-Ironing-Before-It’s-Ironed Palaver that MummyEls has inflicted upon her daughter. Teaching assistant Jo admits she likes nothing better than to come home after a days’ kiddie-coping, and indulge herself with some mindless cyber-violence, while Breila gets a head massage from Signe to relax..... Euphemia discovers that Pugs don’t look Pretty in Pink - especially fuchsia - and Gusti enters the To Iron or Not To Iron debate with a resounding and crumpled NO! Jo confesses to dressing Britannia in disguise to save her own blushes, Marsha thinks Mini-Marek should become the Team mascot , and Lady Grey makes her first appearance in a LONG time! ENGLAND complain gently about fussy and nagging Mums, and Elb gets snowed under by the avalanche of posts which sneak up on her as she types...... She posts a multitude of emoticons to cover all eventualities, one of which comes in handy when Catherine posts up the Wulfiness on a T-shirt that she has printed.... Els decides that films are like buses, and can’t make up her mind - or eyes - which bus to watch......Sick woo-man Catherine confesses to loving ironing, so Jo volunteers her for the ENGLAND laundry, while Cathy, now deladdered and clean of paint, posts a link to her new vid....

Euphemia, now most Photobucketly proficient, opens Chez Euphemia and offers up such delicacies as Roast Snake on a bed of fresh greens, and Testicles a la Maison.... Excitable carrots are an outstanding success, but Tina, Eeyore and Goffy give Euphemia’s eaterie a miss...Elb announces she’s a SLOB and agrees with Els that domestic chores are pointless, as things only get dirty/wrinkled/dusty again.... Gusti and Tina join forces with the SLOBS, but Marsha admits that she too loves ironing, but is pressed for time......... Euphemia thinks that SLOBS Secretly Like Ogling Butler, but Elb reveals that it really means Slovenly Lard-arse Overindulges on Butler.... Eeyore still wants to be a SLOB, Marsha wakes up cuddly or horny, and Breila passes round her freshly-made chocolate cake to SLOBS and non-SLOBS alike.... Els chooses nasty Deppness for her bedtime viewing, but only until his icky eyes fall out. So much for Marsha not being talkative - she rabbits incessantly until her computer has enough and drops the connection! Jackie finds out curious things about Marsha by reading ENGLAND, and Cathy’s new vid goes down a storm with the Team, making far better bedtime viewing than Els’ film of icky Deppness, as all eyes stay in heads where they belong.....

Elb has further fun with her favourite few inches of plastic, and Sparkle suggests obviously-idle Elb does a photo-montage of Mini-Marek’s exploits, an idea that is encouraged by Els and discounted promptly by ever-so-busy Elb.....Vanessa returns soggy-shouldered after comforting her friend, to find uncensored vegetables in ENGLAND, Marsha and Elb are left out of the vid-loop as Cathy’s new vid has reached maximum download, and Jo concentrates hard while screencapping THAT scene in TR2... Elb asks her if she has a Lara Croft doll, as her Mini-Marek fancies re-enacting the passion in plastic, but he is sadly disappointed and sulks.... Els offers to send Jack over for male-bonding, and Goffy gets excited while reviewing the Terry-tumbling scene and something crops up - or so she thinks..... ENGLAND is agog. Marek squishes his b*****ks into an undersized chair while Elb squishes the b*****ks of the thread into an oversized blog, and giddy Lady Grey charges up and down the motorway....... Eeyore multi-tarts, Em gets assaulted, insulted and wet, but is otherwise just dandy..... Elb has a cunning plan, and suggests that Dragon (who make Mini-Mareks) might make multiple Gerry-heads for Marek. Business manager Els advises her to get a cut of the profits, Eeyore doesn’t like the idea of decapitating Marek and Em stifles her comments about multiple heads...... Elb says that Marek’s got a biggun, and the Mini-Man smirks. Vanessa takes her leaning tower of laundry to Catherine Twankey’s, and drags her Bay City Rollers gear out of mothballs, while Eeyore makes the startling announcement that Tarts can’t triple up at the Marriott as planned! Ellie Mae pops in at the last minute, as does agony Auntie Jan, wanting to know what the lowdown is...... Elb berates her Yorkshire chumlet for being out late on a school night, then issues an End of Thread Alert along with a Buck-Passing baton as she’s up to her ears in Abridging! Jo accepts the challenge, and prompted by Elb’s multiple- bonced Marek idea, Yorkie ponders spinning-headed dollies in pre-Exorcist days when she was but a Lass.......

Jo launches ENGLAND shows their age at 111... (or is that eleventy-one?) with Gerry wondering if he’s about to lose his head...... Goffy, Jo and Vanessa join Yorkie in a quick singalong of “Jake the Peg” while contemplating Gerry’s middle leg, diddle iddle iddle dum....... and swallow-dive spectacularly into the Gutler for late-night swimming practice. Wet and tired and not a little wrinkled, ENGLAND dries up, turns in and drifts off, leaving Jo to lock the doors for the night..........