ENGLAND 77-78 : the Sound of Music, ants and picspam!

Picking through the debris of last night’s Von Trappfest, Catherine opens ENGLAND’s curtains and hopes she is not alone.... Snow and Signe join her and mull over beverages whilst Elb, despite having a day off work, shows dedication to the cause and gets up for BC.... Signe gets excited about a fridge, and Elb wonders how Snow can post from work, while still despatching emergency services to the right addresses.....Euphemia is still battling ants, and has the hairdo from Hell this morning.... Jo bounces in, far too bright for the hour.... Elb ponders using coffee on her bog-brush hair instead of mousse, while her pussy needs medical attention, and Euphemia is pantless until sufficient caffeine allows co-ordination for dressing! Loobrush and Medusa, (discount hair salons) are formed......Signe runs to (or from) reality, and Catherine downloads and consumes a variety of buns. ENGLAND hires a familiar waiter for BC, and Berenise has Breakfast Club to go, as she’s at work... Seeing Elb’s array of Drool Pit staff, Jo feels the need for a doctor.... and Tennant-Totty appears in Breakfast Club! Els too has BC to go, and Snow wonders if puffy-pants Casanova has gas.... Daft helpfully posts concert info, and Elb relays it to Tina before finally closing Breakfast Club and heading off to the Real World...

Els posts a link to Tennant-Totty icons, Breila has beans on toes, and Doctors Butler and Who are called into service..... Lunchtime brings Yorkie home, with a request to go on the Avebury picnic, and Gracie returns to play catch-up. She is pleased to have fleeced local businesses for money, and is making her getaway in a caravan to Scotland. Catherine and Elb promise to behave in Glasgow, but have their fingers crossed behind their backs, and Eeyore catches up from work after no internet last night, announcing she has a toyboy admirer. Els breaks office equipment and Elb adds another cyber-child (Eeyore) to her expanding interweb family..... She is a grumpy old woo-man because her neighbour is disturbing the peace, and wants to slap an ASBO on him. Or just slap him....... Goffy enquires after Elb’s poorly pussy who has been to the vet, and cost her an arm and a leg... Em is delighted with 21 inches of Gerry, Breila reckons Gerry got better still with her new telly, and Elb complains at the cost of laundromats whilst posing far-reaching questions about Stenders..... Jo is worried that hubby is turning into a closet Tartan, and Goffy too wonders why nobody has a washing machine in Albert Square. She considers camping at her Doctors’ surgery, and posts a pic of her dog seemingly decapitated by a frisbee...... ENGLAND decide some of Gerry’s lesser films aren’t REALLY worth buying, and Elb suggests edited Gerrylights would be helpful. She provides a link for Em to watch “Please!” as Em hasn’t yet seen it.... Berenise is home alone hoping she’s not visited by spiders, and is off to a fellow BritTart’s birthday bash tomorrow. Euphemia boasts of her 28 inches of Gerry, and ENGLAND persuade Berenise to watch “Attila” . A sensible discussion of Gerry Butler films ensues, with team members offering opinions on several movies, until a horrified Jo realises that the silliness has been left at the door.... Elb too is astounded, and gives a heads-up to another Anatomy lecture on the KT on Saturday night...... A relieved Eeyore arrives, happy that her internet is working once more, and Snow is confused when she finds ENGLAND doing “serious” instead of anarchy..... Rectifying the situation immediately, Jo and Elb indulge in Bad-Boy Picspam Poker, and Eeyore joins the fray. Daft complains of insomnia which mars her 7 week holiday from work, and Eeyore suggests meditation, while Elb recommends yoga classes to help her relax.... Els reckons Gerry is smuggling bananas, but Elb assures her it’s a Sea Cucumber...... She launches a new thread, mistakenly thinking ENGLAND are at the end of their tether....and has to retrace her virtual steps to finish off the old thread with a bit of HamsterSpam....

ENGLAND - 78 RPM (repeats picspam mostly...) begins, unsurprisingly, where 77 ended - with picspam.... firstly GerSpam from pap vids, then Cathy requests nekkid back pictures - ENGLAND obliges.... and Jo finally sees the similarity between Hamster and Tennant-Totty! Daft meanwhile, sees them both running opposite ways in a giant wheel... Gerry does Elvis impressions, and Elb sneakily books her washing machine repairman for Wednesday 28th, justifying an afternoon off work! Euphemia had a thing for Mr Spock BG, Catherine reminds ENGLAND gently of the No Pap rule.... and Klingons appear on the starboard bow..... Cathy and Goffy delete their previous pics just in case, and Els manipulates one of her favourite Scotsmen to cause maximum embarrassment.... Tina posts using Lord Wolfshead’s lappy, threatening TennantSpam for Elb tomorrow if she’s back online, and suggests ENGLAND T-shirts for the Con, little knowing that Elb already has a cunning plan..... Catherine poops the party with a headache, Sparkle is tipsy and a cat wees in Euphemia’s bed...... Or was it Sparkle? She makes a hasty exit with amnesia.... Els produces a T-shirt design for BritTarts, and Barbs of the Twins isn’t feeling talkative. Cathy cycles off, Goffy is tired and quiet, so retreats for the night, and Elb is left to finish Abridging while Jo and Eeyore float round the boards...... Breila arrives late after celebrating the Danish version of Bonfire Night, with yummy food and family on the beach, and is interrogated by ENGLAND as to her roots. The After-Hours Club are duly impressed by Breila’s standard of English and her love of history, which strikes a note with Jo, as she too is a history buff. Elb bids goodnight, but not before putting on her Grumpy Old Woo-man head and complaining about rowdy children outside her house at ridiculous hours.... Jo reckons someone else can lock up tonight, and turns in....