England 71 - Do we get a small hard Italian biscuit with that?

Gusti is up and at ‘em early, as she has too much going on in her head. She is joined by yesterday’s newcomer to the ENGLAND threads, Snowqueen from Michigan, who leaves a message for Del about her dream..... Catherine touches base, then wings off to catch up, and Gusti is touched after reading GALS stories of their encounter with Gerry! Elb arrives, queasy, and posts a link to Beth’s Memory Book thread.... She must be ill, as she contemplates housework..... Snow is officially greeted by ENGLAND, who were a bit tardy in laying out the Welcome mat.... Catherine has memory problems with her computer, and Elb just has memory problems..... ENGLAND don’t do Technical, but Catherine’s woes resolve themselves. Jo will have to buy lipstick just for Gerry, and Els very nearly makes it to BC as she hasn’t slept, but can’t be arsed and makes do with Jaffa cakes and Coke....

At lunchtime, Els gives the heads-up to a post by Admin stating that the announcement for Glasgow is imminent, and will have its own site for registration.... ENGLAND starts saving....... Em is excited, and Catherine reckons Els is psychic, as she has just sent Elb a text re.the Glasgow news! Evangelia is cheered by Els’ news, but then depresses herself just in case she can’t go to TartCon 2.... Del has an attack of emoticons, and explains erratically to Evangelia and Catherine that someone or something has bucketed up her plans, and that her head needs to download onto her PC..... Eva offers help, and Jem offers popcorn, while Els sympathises and throws things. Gusti is delirious with delight after buying a new backpack, and Snow reappears with a potted biog, and advice for Del. She thanks ENGLAND for their welcome, and requests the back-catalogue of ENGLAND titles....... Em and Barbs sympathise with all having a bad day, but Gusti dances around her apartment - happiness truly IS a new backpack...... Karan and Barbs are eager to meet everyone, and Del considers ditching all she owns in order to travel light.... Gusti and Del exchange Backpack-spam and Elb drags herself into the thread, pooped after work. She says that Yorkie is back, and should be in later... As she comes in, so Gusti and Del depart, leaving paranoia as Elb's threadfellow. Els considers POTO v Brazil and wonders who will win..... Em joins in with the bag-ladies and uses her uber-sexy suitcase as a means of transport... Elb posts an ad from Asunta who is offering a free OMK DVD, and quick-thinking Catherine suggests ENGLAND have it as a raffle prize! Barbs can’t get into Abridged..., and Goffy gets in after a Very Bad Day. She is in dire need of hugs after coping with very poorly relatives, so Auntie Elb comes to the rescue. A new hairdo has gone some way to restoring Goffy’s spirits, as she has been to her lucky-dip salon and come out blonde...... Parker fares worse at Catherine’s hands, and is forced to wear his hairnet again, while Catherine will have hair to dye for on Thursday....... Curly Em offers Goffy her shoulder, and Elb’s cat joins the iPod set.

The Wanderer returns! Yorkie is back on dry land after her micro-cruise on a mega-boat, and is welcomed back into ENGLAND with open arms. Catherine is in WOOTing mood tonight and issues a double set of WOOTs for Yorkie’s return, and for the Final Countdown to Tarting About in London. She also assures Elb that she will not be dressing Parker in his silly trouser suit for the show tomorrow.... Euphemia, Goffy and Em push out the welcome wagon, and Boat-spam begins.....Cathy gets snoggus interruptus in a Ger-dream, while Catherine gets emotional over the Vegas stories. Miss Hyde makes her excuses as she has exams tomorrow, Em teases Els with the image of Cap’n Jack in JUST his boots *WOOT!* and Euphemia keeps getting the boot! ENGLAND wish Miss Hyde well for her exams, so she can be betterer ejucatid like wot they are. Els is crying her crab eyes out over Vegas stories, and wubs Big G more ‘n ever.....while Elb wants to see Gerry in Adam Ant/Cap’n Jack gear. Talk turns naturally to cake, and while Elb and Em slurp over carrot cake, Tina goes nuts for M&S walnut cake. Yorkie (no cake preference as yet) spent a morning in bed with Gerry having a Game of her Life, and is currently in headless chicken mode.... Speaking of which, Miss Hyde retires to panic....Els sticks a stamp on her butt and sends herself hotfoot to Hades for Cap’n Gerard lust....

ENGLAND decamps to the GALS site to indulge in communal sniffing, and passing of tissues as they wade through emotional stories of Gerry-encounters. Em relays that Goffy is trapped in GB.net limbo - she can read what ENGLAND are saying, but can’t post! Els reveals that her Mum doesn’t actually know who Gerry is......... ENGLAND vow to educate the poor woo-man. Kelli drops in to ENGLAND to empathise with the general AWWWWing of the Gerry-Vegasness, and Yorkie has been sidetracked on her way to catching up, whilst Eeyore hesitates to dip her toe into the rather soggy thread.... Els provides Tech Support for Barbs, and ENGLAND resort to bog roll when Cathy comes back from GALS, and there is a communal cheer when Goffy makes it back into GB.net after her technical problems! A chilled-out Sparkle pops in to dish out hugs to all in need...Yorkie is still trying to catch up, and the Paranoia clan discuss Adam Ant and Antmusic, and dogs in hairnets...then ENGLAND log off for Lost... Eeyore in the meantime opens a photo-processing lab, and ENGLAND return in between ads for discussion of Hunky Lost Blokes showering in tandem....

Em gets her insects mixed up (she’s not an Em-tomologist...) and Elb gets hot under the collar at two wet men.... Em retires with a choice of two men and takes both to bed, while Del hints at possible Sawyer-spam to follow... Elb offers up an alternative soggy bod in the form of sultry Sayeed, but steers her lustful thoughts back on track with a loyally selected Gerrypic. It is short-lived as Del posts a nightcap of Sawyer pics, followed swiftly by a triple-whammy of semi-nekkid Sayeed, Doc Hunky and Sweaty Sawyer, all in one luscious package...... Jo, Elb and Yorkie all do a simultaneous :thunk: and ENGLAND, exhausted, head for bed......