England 70 - this isn’t your Grannie’s Zimmer frame....

Euphemia can’t sleep, so opens ENGLAND early with an array of pastries. Gusti needs coffee and the new Gerry pics on the GALS site to wake up, and Goffy has pulled an all-nighter, thus making it to Breakfast Club and surprising Catherine and Elb! ENGLAND appears to have swapped weather with Gusti’s country - there has been rain overnight, while Gusti is enjoying bright sunshine! The site is still slow, and Elb suggests that she contacts Admin to consider deleting old ENGLAND threads, as they are taking up bandwidth, and everyone agrees... Catherine reckons the site is slow due to traffic volume after the Gerry-in-Vegas news, and worries about her raffle prize in the heat of London.... Everyone gah’s over the new pictures in the gallery... Jo (who has also finally made it to BC!) raises the valid point that post counts may be affected if threads are deleted, and Els drops in from work to find that everyone has buggered off to work, except Catherine.... Faenwyn from Louisiana pays ENGLAND a visit to let us know we ain’t seen nuthin’ yet regarding heat - it was 101 chez Faenwyn yesterday.... Miss Hyde hates thunder, and agrees with the thread deleting idea, and a bored Els finds a fellow Jack Sparrow addict.... Em slept through the storm, and is fatally affected by new Gerrypics. Miss Magdalena is well on her way to becoming a scientist, and is honouring ENGLAND with a new haircut for Saturday! Del and Eeyore do lunch, the latter with damp undies after reading Abridged... (Thank you! What greater compliment than soggy drawers?!) Miss Hyde adds self-confessed hypocrisy to procrastination as she advises Magdalena to carry on studying! Evangelia joins the slackers from work, and Em’s new Attila siggy is drawing compliments. Del has filled the ENGLAND water cooler with G&T, so it’s off down the slippery slope for all..... Catherine announces that Therese Raquin is to be “raunchy” according to the Daily Star, and ENGLAND rubs their hands with glee. Extra drool buckets will have to be ordered.... Els, hot and sticky, heads off to band practise, longing for winter, and Goffy the Permanently Awake pleads for friends on her MySpace blog.... Jo and Gusti don’t have MySpace, but Miss Hyde does, although she goes temporarily deaf in one ear. She too wishes for chillier days... Jo does Hokey-Cokey posting, and Gusti is concerned for Miss Hyde’s lugholes. She practises packing her backpack ready for Friday and proves Elb’s accusation correct that she has a shoe fetish....

Elb arrives with the announcement that Admin would be delighted if ENGLAND’s earlier threads could be deleted, and that she has asked about the post count issue.... Em suggests a Memorial Service for threads 1-65 to say goodbye.... *sob*
Elb is pleased to get support from ENGLAND, as she was worried she had overstepped the mark.... Catherine adds reassurance, and cannot decide which Gerriness to watch! Everyone is either packed or packing for London, but GB.net is playing silly buggers again, and dedicated though ENGLAND is, patience is wearing thin.... Tina posts third time lucky, adds her vote for Thread Pruning, and starts singing “The Final Countdown”! Barbs is back from seeing her daughter in Egypt, and had a signed Red Death photo waiting for her when she got home.... Euphemia too is in, third time lucky, and Elb tells ENGLAND that post counts will NOT be affected by the imminent demise of earlier threads. Tina would like a group photo of BritTarts and Hons, Sparkle does a fly-by as she’s on her way out, but thoroughly enjoyed her birthday, and was very nearly a groupie for Bon Jovi! Cathy too bursts into song, and she and Euphemia agree with Tina’s group photo idea, as does Elb, who has plans...... Gusti is still packing and unpacking far too many clothes, and Marsha thinks Elb is sad and lonely! She also has trouble typing and rates Lamb & Mint crisps next to “Mr & Mrs Smith” starring Brangelina..... Del wants directions to the Gerry-in-Vegas pics on the GALS site, and is a sucker for a doggy tale, and Cathy joins the Green-Eyed Girls who are just the teensiest bit jealous of When the GALS Saw The Butler.... Elb is indignant that Marsha thinks she’s sad and lonely, but declares her paranoia instead..... Els returns from band practise with too much info on the Bandstand’s stomach, which sends Euphemia rushing for ‘Stenders....which Del informs her isn’t on, due to some silly game where grown men run around kicking a pig’s bladder..... Marsha apologises to Elb for her comment, which Elb had misunderstood anyway, and Del gets pepper in her eye. Cathy takes off on her bike for The Other Site, and Snowqueen discovers Del and stays to play! Els keeps forgetting what she was going to say, as she is watching footie/Totti/totty..... and ENGLAND tell pug stories..... Gusti is gutted that she missed Totti and Blu WOOTS for Australia winning their match, despite not following football. Catherine manages to get back online - everyone is having intermittent problems, and a hammer for solving computer problems is readily available.... Goffy kicks her way in, and thanks those who are now her Friends on MySpace, while Blu signs the B&G petition for something to do. Marsha tells ENGLAND interesting facts about pepper, and discusses Big Love with fellow Americans, and Els plays Spoiler fun with Peekaboo Pants Man, who is nearly revealing his Big Love....... She gets a red card from Del, and Jo slips up. Snow reveals interesting facts about honey, Del uses garlic and onion to clean her room, but Els really puts the cat amongst the pigeons with a volley of disloyal droolage, (and Booshness) redeemed only by her final links........... Catherine has watched POTO to get herself in the mood, but should maybe have just looked at Els’ post instead... Tina polishes up her Tartdar for Saturday, Cathy cools off with jelly, and ENGLAND have the usual end-of-thread panic before Els posts up the new thread, and Catherine and Tina mark the end of the old one by discussing the weather....

The team wander into ENGLAND 71 after a push from Els who HAS to get a Boosh reference in, and Del laughs her arse off....Tina worries about insufficient Gerriness on the ENGLAND threads, which Cathy promptly rectifies by slipping one in. Goffy WOOTs the new threadness, Elb does her stern professor impression, Snow gets chills, and Jamie pops up again... Els provokes a cyber-smack from web-mummy Elb, who in turn is berated by Marsha for eating so late..... ENGLAND falls silent early, and Elb is left to tuck the cat up, put the sleeping ENGLANDers out, and ........ gets the crap scared out of her when Snow, Jo and Jessey all start posting, followed by Eeyore who is trying to set up a MySpace blog...... Jessey is beset by problems, and is desperately trying to get to London, despite being put down to work that day! Elb supplies links and phone number in answer to Jessey’s pleas, and Jo and Eeyore are appointed ENGLAND’s skeleton crew for Saturday, while the rest of ENGLAND are off gallivanting.... Jo sings “Whale Meat Again.....” as she plans to be at the next get-together... Finally, ENGLAND shut up and retire, leaving Elb in peace to put the blog to bed...............