England 69 upside down, inside out, whatever....

.......swinging towards 70.....

Gusti, tired but sunny, opens ENGLAND’s doors for Breakfast Club and lets Catherine in, who has been lurking outside with a frozen computer. Gusti tells of the great excitement from the GALS convention in Las Vegas, where none other than the Hunk himself appeared, and posts a link to photos! She also posts beautiful pictures of Vienna in an effort to encourage Catherine and Elb to visit... Tina joins BC aghast that Gerry appeared in Vegas, and wonders if he will do the same in Colorado... Blu wonders why she is up so early as she didn’t get home till the wee small hours, but frantically tidies up, just in case.....Catherine goes against opinion, and says she can see Gerry doing a romantic comedy, rumoured from Las Vegas to be on the cards...

Sparkle is verra sparkly, it being her birthday, and she plans to go and listen to the Bon Jovi gig tonight for free! She thanks everyone for their birthday wishes, especially Blu whom she met yesterday pre-Jovi, and who started the birthday thread in her honour! Elb gets out of bed on the wrong side, and grouches about Gerry neglecting his UK fans, jealous of those who saw him in Vegas. Gusti continues with her virtual tour of Vienna, and agrees with Elb’s envy of the US fans’ contact with Our Hero. Catherine placates the green-eyed pair and drops subtle hints regarding the BritTart gathering next week... Elb, ashamed at her earlier grouchiness, apologises, but as she hasn’t yet put in her contact lenses, repeats Catherine’s hints in SHOUT mode...Catherine SHOUTS back, specifying exactly when the meet is to take place, declaring that she too “graduated from the Sledgehammer School of Subtlety”...

Miss Hyde appreciates the finer points of the BC’s subtlety, but doesn’t think she’ll be attending Glasgow....Elb goes off to be an Auntie at her nephew’s first birthday party, and Catherine will get her Auntying practise in later this week when she sees her family for the first time in ages.... Jo is up and excited by news from Vegas, but urges ENGLAND to pedal faster as the GB.net engines are barely ticking over. LauraC confirms she is still alive but revising, Berenise joins the “We’re-a-tad-jealous” club, and Catherine wants to apply to look after Gerry’s new puppy. Els finally surfaces, after being much missed, feeling fit and bouncy about next week, and potters off to read “Abridged” to catch up...Catherine reckons G called his puppy Lolita because of the older man/younger woman thing, Miss Hyde doesn’t like pugs, and nor does Els, who goes to the beach promising to return...... The “green” club expands with Eeyore’s arrival, but the anti-pug group also gains a member...... Catherine explains a small dog is more practical for Gerry, and can also be used as a babe-magnet.... The dog talk continues, with Eeyore, Del and Berenise adding opinions. Del and Eeyore are practising procrastination, and Catherine issues a New Thread Alert, as the End is Nigh! Del pulls the short straw and goes to set up 70, while Jo announces that a pug is pairfect for G as they both have a thing about sticking their tongues out. Euphemia reckons she’s a pug-a-like, but carries a stick rather than chases it, and Goffy logs on at the tail end of 69 to hear the news about Gerry and his new puppy. She needs a man and fan, but Del has fan but no man.....

ENGLAND totters into its 70s as directed by Delanie, and is given an opening WOOT by Catherine. Goffy raises ENGLAND’s temperatures with an old favourite of theirs - the Bangkok ‘Just-got-out-of-bed’ Gerry pic, and Del sets up the refreshment stall again. Euphemia attempts to cool off with a spritzer, and Eeyore hits the iced tea after Goffy increases the temperature still further... Tina adds to the mix with further Tennant-teasing for Elb, and Del adds still more, with Miss Hyde’s uncle, until ENGLAND is on the verge of fainting with the heat....Eeyore needs a bucket of cold water thrown over her, and Goffy gets lessons in Firework Safety from Del, who is going into shredding meltdown while Els thinks Gerry is looking tired and skinny.

Blu squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees and runs, Em plays a mean joke on Goffy by saying she’s not going to London, but regrets it. Elb arrives in the thread at teatime, astounded by the amount of chuntering ENGLAND has done while she was out being an Auntie Elb........ She has notified the absent Yorkie about GB in Vegas, and Yorkie is not best pleased, as she was there but 6 weeks ago! Jo sends Goffy off to watch the rest of a favourite film, and Euphemia hates football with a passion. Sparkle is off for Chinese and to scrump some free Bon Jovi and Del has combined TV and GB by watching telly on her computer. Goffy plays with more fireworks most competently, causing Jo to overdrool, and Del is justifiably proud of her student. Em has been busy too and posts up her work, and Elb catches up the runaway thread. She has had a good family day in the Real World, but has a permanent reminder of her afternoon tattooed on her cleavage through sunburn! Jo wears wellies and Marigolds to prevent electric shocks while posting, Em is to be punished for teasing Goffy, and Del enjoys cheap thrills in her electrocuting chair!

Els returns post-football and posts, while Elb returns post-haste and posts. Els is more better than wot she has been, and suggests Portsmouth for a Tarting About venue. Del procrastinates and Elb suggests ENGLAND share the position of Chief Procrastinator but longs for Head Idiotship. ENGLAND play ‘Spot the Els’ and Gusti has been enjoying her own company, but after reading the sizzling afternoon posts, needs ice cream... the team discuss musical instruments, and Eeyore and Del want to learn cello. Strings feature strongly in ENGLAND’s musical abilities, as Miss Hyde plays cello amongst other instruments, and Em can play a wee bit of guitar.

The site is acting up again, so many sign off and retire to bed with their reserve Scotsman....Em posts her new siggy before bed, and Jo needs to adjust her timing, as only Eeyore is left up. The AfterHours Club is in session as they chat about the petition, the weather and various Gerry films, until Jo calls time so that ENGLAND is free for the Breakfast Club.....